the party and the parting..

the party was fun when it started but it ended with a teary-eyed me as i rode the taxi on my way home..

we had dinner in entings.. had some sea foods, followed by a bottle of beer.. thanks, margaha for such a delicious treat.. also in the resto were the reigning queens of the ms. earth 2009 who happen to be from this province.

after dinner we transferred in tropics bar to spend the rest of the night.. after buckets and buckets of beer, we were all drunk.. but not to the point of complete intoxication.. we still have our sanity with us.. we decided to drop by mr donut for a cup of coffee.. time check: 2:00am.

twas this time when the twist of this wonderful evening happened.. i cant elaborate on it though.. private matter.. just want to stress something out for all of you DUMBSHITS, who cant be man enough to take care of your girlfriends!

a man does not leave his girlfriend crying in a public place, worst, in a gasoline station! what kind of man would do that? the fact that ur into a fight is never an excuse! even the fact that your girl wanted you to go away can never justify you leaving her there! i may be gay but i know when and where to act manly! this is so elementary!

sorry bro but this time i cannot tolerate your acts! you never heard anything from us when you came.. we respected your privacy and welcomed you wholeheartedly for our friend. you even had our support.. you have your problems and we let it pass.. you just dont know how that felt.. last night, you prove us wrong! wrong for trying to help you with our friend.. your not worth our sympathy now.. you had your chance..

to my dear friend, wipe your tears away. he's not worth it! dont give him the privilege of seeing you in agony.. rather, make him feel that he just lost one precious gem.. smile.. move on..

psst!..

im back.. i wasnt able to post anything for two days.. not much controversy to write about.. for that im sorry.. yeah, controversies makes me wanna!! hahaha..

again, we have no classes in criminal law today.. dont know when this crilaw torture would end.. we havent finished the revised penal code yet and the enrollment for the next school year is already ongoing.. waaah! dont even know if we are to be greatful for the fact that our professor is trying to finish the course even its a bit off track and way beyond schedule or if we are to condemn him for not giving us a summer break!

we're off to party tonight.. dont know where but we will.. for the record, i will be breaking some rules tonight.. i will party without the knowledge and consent of my partner.. it has become my attitude and a personal unwritten rule to inform my partner of my whereabouts.. anyway, it's just my classmates im going with.. i want to see what's gonna happen next.. il be preparing myself for the 3rd world war when i get home..

just a while ago, rakistah and i had coffee in vienna kafeebar.. talking about his ever famous super j! that guy never fails to amaze me.. he's just sooooooo out-of-this-world! i even told my friends that i would want to have him as my personal tutor in matters of love and friendship! hahaha.. @#^@&$ *@%@&%^@%@&) ^%#@)&+_)*$*&! you know what that means? its a martian statement which means "idol!" hahaha..

ok ok.. i'll cut it now.. i might say inappropriate things should i continue.. dont want to end this blog with a lawsuit! hahaha.. gud day fellahz!

pissed off..

whats wrong with you people?!

before this post, i chatted with some old friends in the net and i received a lot of conference invitations.. please don't get hurt if people refuses to accept your invitations especially if the person your trying to invite is on a serious chat with friends! i dont intend to make an article out of this but im just pissed off with the way other people react! there is this silly person who had been sending me mean messages just for the sole reason that i declined!

as much as i dont want to have online enemies here.. im into the process of listing them ol in my drafts.. to you, "most excellent sir", fuck yourself off!

journal 5-22-09 (pm)..

after my temporary confinement in my bedroom doing nothing but chat, surf, and watch dvds, i went downstairs where the office of my partner is located.. his agents are done with their reports and are now enjoying their spare time tasting the free samples of the new alcoholic beverages of their sister company.. and so i volted in! i did not really joined them.. i picked 4 bottles before i went upstairs.. two coors light beers and two bottles of tanduay ice.. tried tanduay ice first, but since im not used to beverages other than beer, i was easily drowned by the spirit of drunkeness.. twas good.. but its not my forte..

after some minutes, the headache and the spinning was gone.. time check: 8:30pm. we went to the cinema to watch star trek.. ive seen it already but i wanted to see it again on the big screen.. it's still more exciting to watch in the moviehouses than watch it even in the home theater.. before the clock striked midnight, we were home..

im goin out today.. 1 day of confinement is enough.. cant go on a second one..

time out..

for a change, i almost tied my feet just to spend the whole day in my room.. no smoke and caffeine for today.. just me and my shih (jasper) and my laptop and some dvd's.. my eyes are tired.. been staring at my laptop's monitor and the lcd screen since 6am.. my room is adorned with empty wrappers of chips and curls.. and my shih is really loving it! he enjoys playing with them! i need a time out.. bye for now..

update..

after spending some moments alone yesterday, rakistah invited me for a drink.. after 3 bottles, elyang came to join us and we transferred to the music box just beside genesis.. ordered another round as we alternately took our turns singing.. no excuses this time.. either you sing what's in the screen or you choose your type of song.. margaha came with another round of beer and some pork and chicken barbeque.. im drunk, i admit (and so with rakistah) but the joy of the moment kept us kickin'! the group is slowly reuniting now.. for that, im happy.. surprisingly, my partner and i didnt have a verbal altercation when he fetched me from the music box.. we dropped by in the mall for some groceries and had the best sleep so far..

just hours ago, i went to my bestfriend's house.. his granny was brought to the hospital for check-up.. she's been ill for two days now.. good thing there were no complications..

somebody asked me this morning if i am into satanism in this blog.. am i? a RESOUNDING NO! its just that i can see myself in the picture.. an ultimate sinner who's been praying for forgiveness to bro.. in a way, it may be damn negative and a hell of an exaggeration.. but even the figures of speech have the "hyperbole", right? in order to maximize the impact of the statement for the readers to easily picture out..

that's all for now fellahz.. my friends are waiting for me outside.. mwah mwah mwah!!

think again..

i consumed my morning texting my bestfriend's mom and placing calls to my family in the province to check if everything is ok.. so far, there is nothing much to worry about.. my mom is under maintenance medications for her slight heart enlargement.. she's doing perfectly fine though.. thank god!

now, im alone again.. sipping a cup of black coffee, smoking the last cigars that i havent consumed last night while taking glances in my criminal law book from time to time.. though im not feeling the usual me, im managing to act normal..

lately, ive been weighing the pros and cons of not continuing law school.. maybe its because my friends are thinking the same thing.. im a bit afraid that should they decide to stop, i will again be searching for trustees to share personal problems with as well as insights on some academic matters.. i dont want to entertain the thought so much since law school is my last setback.. apart from the promises i have given to my family.. but the thought still lingers..

ive been alone for the last four to five years of my life.. and by alone i mean that during those times, i have never exposed the real me to anybody.. even to the friends i met along the way.. i never wanted to be on such a state for the second time.. now that i have finally found some friends who have been amazingly respectful and understanding about my shames and imperfections, i cant afford to loose them anymore.. i have lost a lot of treasures already.. enough!

think again.. please..

morning madness..

i dont know what to think or write today.. i woke up crying but i can't remember what my dream was.. i woke up alone in bed.. my partner is gone already.. a note told me he went to church.. my heart is beating like crazy.. something is wrong..

let me be..

i was wrong to think that the person im talking about in my previous posts didn't sensed my distance.. he's not that insensitive.. he knew me so much not to notice it..

last night he texted me.. he wanted the same old me.. told me that he missed our conversations.. the more personal ones.. not the stupid just-to-have-something-to-talk-about conversations.. i was moved, honestly.. but i wanted to be on track..

to you my friend, let me be.. just this time..not that i would want to forget about the friendship.. its not like that.. it's the last thing in my mind.. please dont get me wrong.. you told me when we last talked that you're afraid that you might not reciprocate my love.. twas not a proposal or anything, you know that, but i need to step back and establish some distance.. otherwise, i will be totally unfair to you..

i am more than happy when you told me your concerns about the "miss" part.. that sounded music in my ears.. but i wanted that the next time we meet, i can look you in the eye and tell you im no longer attracted to you.. and tell you I LOVE YOU without any meaning other than the sincerest love of a friend..

for the meantime, please bear with my one-worder-sms'..

obsessed..

i am totally in love with blogging.. hooked up.. obsessed.. whatever you call it.. i can stay forever just staring at my blog or reading other blog posts in my links.. this is all your fault buninay! lol

if only i dont run out of anything to write about, i would definitely be posting over and over til my fingers bleed! i wanted to post more and think less.. i wanted but i wont.. can't compromise friendship and the things that matter over my obsessions.. im still, so far, in my lucid interval not to cross the boundary that prohibits me from meeting face to face with my alter ego.. the insane demented "lost soul" that's been haunting me for ages..

i still wanted and prefer the sane me posting blogs here.. gudeve fellahz!

blah blah blah..

i had lunch at lord byron's.. guys, it's a must try if you're into eating baby back ribs.. the place only serves that dish of two variants but its worth it.. not so cozy and crowded, but the place must be frequented by people of class and prominence.. i was able to see some doctors and businessmen a while ago..

after lunch i dropped by at paulines for a mass card offering but they run out of it.. instead i picked a biblical verse from their bowl where you can read and relate your present life with.. here's what i picked:

"for freedom christ has set us free, stand firm, therefore, and do not submit again to a yoke of slavery". galatians 5:1

another sign, i guess.. but instead of totally detaching myself from him, we ended up meeting again. dont worry, it's a casual meet-up.. just a quick lunch for him and we stayed in a coffee shop for a round-o-talk.. im glad he never noticed my distance..

im happy now.. im getting used to the feeling.. i can say that somehow, i no longer feel affected with his whereabouts for the past few days.. thank gee-oh-dee!

step one..

i'm not sure if i would to call yesterday a happy one.. been out the whole day and so far, i haven't texted the person i'm trying to get off my system.. the only accomplishment i guess for the 17th.. i attended the sunday mass before anything and the homily gave me a little more courage.. there were lots of signs telling me that what i'm doing was right..

he texted me good morning today and since i have no reason to hate him, i replied back.. my words are meticulously chosen.. nothing that may suggest anything.. just a one-worder-sms will do.. no details.. no questions.. just plain answers.. good thing he didn't notice..

i just hope i can go on with the second step.. i dont even know what's my next move..

anxiety

if there is such a thing as the language of violence, then i would love to learn how to speak and do it.. if this is the parameter in measuring the courage of a man, then i would be willing to perfect the same.. but that would also mean that i will be battling with myself and the principles i have adopted for the last 26 years of my life..

i've been on a lot of argumentation and debates but honestly, i have never punched a man or slapped any woman in my life.. never been in a fistfight.. ever.. i am a blue-balled-coward strand in the kingdom animalia, phylum vertebrata, class mammalia, order primates, family hominidae, genus homo, species homo sapiens.. now im beginning to hate myself.

it has always been my justification that a civilized man should not step down to the level of the "UN-"men.. the UNeducated, UNdignified.. UNcivilized.. UNworthy.. UNscrupulous or UNprincipled.. UN so on! lol. slowly, im beginning to realize that although part of my justification may be morally commendable, the whole thing can be so stressful especially when my it's-ok-i-forgive-you state of mind is disgusted beyond endurance..

i wanted to shout.. to punch someone.. or even curse for that matter.. even for the first time.. maybe, just maybe, it will help extract all my emotional anxiety.. all of it! and be able to breath.. and smile.. again..

the art of letting go..

before i went to sleep last night, i convinced myself that i will be making a post about this one today.. maybe the group hasn't realized it yet that somehow, we are experiencing the same struggles right now.. of course on matters of letting go..

my group involves six (6) personas.. me being the only vampire among the lycans.. its good to be a villain from time to time.. lolz! an entrepreneur, a police, a call center agent, a singer, a late comer, and me, an asshole.. all struggling to be, someday, lawyers..

the entrepreneur.. a she. just last night we had a drink at piazza.. there was really no plan of us meeting there.. i was in the place oredy when she called and asked me where i was. she came.. damn she's hot! if only im straight, i would have married her oredy! hahaha.. we talked. she just broke up with her boyfriend.. or in the words of a comrade, her summer romance..

the police. a she. the month of april, specifically the end of april had been so harsh with this lady.. i believe she deserves an applause. though she's still on her stage of movin' on after a let go problem, she seems perfectly fine..

the call center agent. a she. a series of unfortunate events almost swallowed her whole. but little as she is, she managed to breath in the tiniest cracks and squeezed herself out of the oblivion.. the letting go part? nah.. you dont wanna know..

the singer. again, a she.. i think among us, maybe she have mastered the skill oredy.. just lately, she broke up with her ex-boyfriend who has become, sorry to tell you this, to be our object of joke and ridicule. you can't blame us, he just acted like a complete dumbshit forcing the group to hate him!

the late comer. also a she. now her story is different.. but the ending was not a happily ever after.. but happily letting go.. what could be worse than loving an insensitive jackass? oops! sorry.. dont really know the whole story.. i might be pre-judging the guy.. but that's how it sounds for me..

the asshole.. me! mine is too simple.. but so far it still is letting go.. just yesterday, before i went to piazza, i had a serious conversation with a friend.. a friend whom im afraid im gradually falling in love with.. so as early as yesterday, i had to let go of the emotional burden.. told HIM my baggage.. now im trying to free myself under such captivating potion.. slowly learning the art of letting go...

been a while since the group had a bonding time together.. i hope it will be soon..

gift..

today seems promising.. after breakfast, i got a gift from my partner.. it was an image my guardian angel.. i never knew who my guardian angel is until now.. Saint Sealtiel is the name.. the archangel of worship and contemplation.. how did i know that? i googled it! hahaha.. dont know much about him as i do with the ever famous michael-gabriel-raphael.. but i will try to get in touch with him.. sorry for the not so clear pic.. i dont have my cam here right now.. i just used my cheap cam-phone for the shot.

wanna know your guardian angel? check this page: http://www.viloria.com/viloria/adi/guardian.shtml

Here's a bit of something about St. Sealtiel that i found in my getting-to-know-my-angel stage..

St. Sealtiel continually stands before God, with incenser in hand in unceasing adoration of the Most Holy Trinity. As the Archangel of contemplation and worship, his angelic purity transforms the love and worship which we mortals give to God. We need St. Sealtiel's powerful intercession before God's throne to overcome the evils of hedonism in our day. May the evils of drug addition, sex exploitation and abortion become things of discredited past. May endless hymns of praise rise from all peoples as they chant in union with the Heavenly Choirs of Angels, in perpetual thanksgiving for God's bountiful blessings. He is known to be the angel who stopped Abraham from killing his son Isaac as a sacrifice. (Gen. 22:12)

mawnin fellahz!!

fear of not knowing..

while inside the cab on our way to mu shu last saturday night, i dont know what our topic was, i told elyang that i will be posting about the fear of not knowing.. it was only today that i remembered it.. while trying to organize my thoughts in line with such an argument, i asked myself over and over.. weighing between the fears and the joys of not knowing.. makes sense right?

should we settle in hearing the truth that will definitely be hurtful or will it be more convenient to just ignore our intuition and embrace what our naked eyes and our uncomplicated understanding would want us to believe?

for one mature person, this question is too easy.. but for a childish-paranoid-sinful-masochist-blogger, le'me think first..

ok.. im done..

surprisingly, i found one best way to answer it.. all you have to to is list all your self-definitions.. just about any word, be it a noun or an adjective, which you can associate with.. (just like what i wrote about me in the preceding pars..) and voila! you've got yourself an answer!

truth is painful.. pain is my happiness.. i am a masochist. how complex is that? we all have different personalities.. and distinct as we are, we all have our own ways to respond.. of course its a matter of analysis.. case to case basis.. but i dont want a too complicated blog to start my day.. for now im gonna stick to my definitions.. i dont want to wage war against my worst enemy.. ME!

mawnin!

behind blue eyes..

elyang told me about this song from Limp Bizkit..
i fell in love with it the moment i read the lyrics.. suits me!

No one knows what it's like
To be the bad man
To be the sad man
Behind blue eyes
And no one knows
What it's like to be hated
To be fated to telling only lies

[Chorus:]
But my dreams they aren't as empty
As my conscience seems to be
I have hours, only lonely
My love is vengeance
That's never free

No one knows what its like
To feel these feelings
Like i do, and i blame you!
No one bites back as hard
On their anger
None of my pain and woe
Can show through

[Chorus]

Discover l.i.m.p. say it [x4]
No one knows what its like
To be mistreated, to be defeated
Behind blue eyes
No one knows how to say
That they're sorry and don't worry
I'm not telling lies

[Chorus]

No one knows what its like
To be the bad man, to be the sad man
Behind blue eyes..

night outs..

in my world, people are strong.. they bleed.. but they don't cry.. they suffer.. but they don't curse.. they fall.. but they always rise and continue struggling.. they love.. and never.. less..

in our eyes, some people are just spices of life.. some are rarity.. while others are pain in the ass.. we always try to distinguish people as to how they look, how much they cost, how far they have gone and how brainiac he/she is.. you know what's the first thing that comes to my mind when i think of these? the waste segregation program! hahaha.. next tym miss, check yourself first before you try asking me bout who my friends are in such a classic note of underestimation while your eyebrows are raised to the heavens! milady, ive been to your place and i think i should be the one questioning you where have all your cookies gone?? or should i say, was it even there in the first place? im sorry guys, it just pisses me off.. i met this lady, who i thought was a well mannered friend last friday night when i was out with some friends.. i dont choose my friends here bitch.. for as long as you dont do drugs, you dont do crimes, and possesses a little drama of "MANNER".. we're good to go..

other than that, my friday was good.. videoke and beers with my bestfriend and his buddies.. by the way, thanks mak! we ended our session at 5am and i went home at 8am.. my head's spinnin! need a rest.. i still have another session to attend that night..

saturday.. after dinner in piazza, we went to cafe breizh.. we were one of the first customers of the bar.. my clock reads 10pm.. ordered some salad, fries and beers then started the night of fun.. we invited mr. busted who have just arrived mountaineering.. we noticed that the crowd is packed with oldies.. major emergency!!! hahaha this should not be! we transferred to mu shu bar.. the place was sooooo crowded.. luckily, my bestfriend saw some of his friends and offered us a place to sit.. love it.. i should be here often.. lol.. by 4am we ate noodles in chowking before we separated ways..

the rest? history! hahaha

day off..

i am appealing from your humble benevolence, some time to rest.. i really am in need of that right now.. i can't think.. i can still smell beer flowing in my veins.. im sleepy.. later, i still have another drinking session to attend to.. let me write about it tomorrow or maybe some other time.. as of now, let me have my day off..

dont get me wrong..

while waiting for my partner in the parking area of a certain mall here in bcd the other night, the car parked right beside ours caught my attention.. posted in front of the car was a sticker which reads: JESUS IS ENOUGH FOR ME.. i am a man of sayings and of quotes that everytime i come across one, i always make it a point that i do understand what it means and negate, even in my mind, if such is objectionable..

im not really that spiritual but i do attend sunday masses.. i can't even say that im morally upright because i am not.. this is no news for everybody.. but to say that such line suits me would be me in the peak of my hypocrisy.. wait wait wait.. don't get me wrong.. let me explain..

i dont want to pollute your minds into thinking that we need to detach ourselves with jesus.. this is not my point here.. it's just that "enough" is such a powerful word to use in such a line.. we need jesus.. this i cannot rebut.. but to rely solely on jesus is way different.. in fact, unacceptable.. even a 2nd grader knows the famous saying "do ur best and god will do the rest.." (nasa diyos ang awa, nasa tao ang gawa).. yes, god is merciful.. but god is also just.. he only answers the prayers of those who deserves his mercy.. his blessings.. god gave us intelligence and wisdom so that we may have the tool in solving our own problems.. when all else fails, then that's the time we pray for his intervention.. isn't that more spiritually and morally logical?

maybe, if i have come across or heard this line from a poor yet happy and contented man, maybe it would have given me a different interpretation.. but seeing this line posted in front of a car parked inside a mall seemed to be a bit misplaced..

just a thought..

p.s. - again, everything i say here is of my personal view which, i believe, i am entitled to.. should you have any opposition, FEEL FREE to make your OWN blog.. signing up is also FEE - FREE! hahaha!
mawnin fellahz!

when the going gets boring..

..the bored gets fucked up!..

(05062009. 1900hrs.)

im alone.. still here in piazza sitting in the same spot like yesterday and the days before that.. im done with crap thinking.. done with wasting my time with sticks of cigarettes and with cups of cheap brewed coffees.. though the place is a bit crowded, i cannot see any familiar face to talk with.. cinemas are not an option either.. saw all of the movies being showed for the week.. ive been reading the revised penal code the whole afternoon but the words have mutated oredy.. they all seem french now.. i am so bored, so to speak..

where have all my peers gone? hellooo.. (echoes..)

i need a talk.. a decent one.

crap thinking..

in our discussion in criminal law, our judge-professor quoted a line from joseph nobels (or nobles) . he said "a lie repeated over and over becomes a truth..." it made me think.. maybe our prof even noticed me staring blankly at the white board while trying to grasp the meaning of what he just said that he asked me a question.. thank god i was able to repond.. though my answer was of no legal basis, it was nonetheless correctly accepted.. whew!

now back to the quote. basing on that premise, it would logically give us the presumption that somehow, a truth can never be truth per se.. since lie or falsity may magically metamorphose into a fact as stated.. in the legal world, there is this animal called the judicial truth as contra-distinguished from a universally accepted one..

should the wordings be interchanged, would that mean something? lolz! not debatable i guess.. what the heck am i blabbing about!

i have already posted an article saying me living in a world of lies.. i am still in that world.. only a handful of people knew that the webs i have wonderfully crafted to fit the outside world are bogus.. does that mean that my repitition of such lies would somehow make me truthful as what the line implies? very funny! hahaha! now a sinner may turn into a saint by being a sinner all his life!

i never knew, even a hint for that matter, that crap thinking can be so damn philosophical! readers, give it a try.. it's fun! lol..

wasted? nahh..!

a day before yesterday, my bestfriend went partying with an old friend.. they finished their drinking session so early.. and by early i mean early morning on the following day.. 5am to be definite.. by midnight he's mom has been texting me o'redy.. and since i went to bed early that night, i responded to her in the morning.. i assured her that my bestfriend is o'ryt and there's nothing to worry about..

yesterday i had this conversation with his mom.. she's concerned by the way his son has been acting this past few weeks.. she can sense that something might be bothering him.. lately, she complains that my bestfriend is always drunk and frequently sleeps somewhere else.. a motherly concern.. and so, as his closest friend, i need to act on the matter..

i am relieved that my bestfriend told me that we are just overreacting.. that he's perfectly fine.. that he's just trying to enjoy his being unemployed for the meantime.. he's a registered nurse by the way.. just finished his volunteering work.. so he's scouting for permanent employment.. whew!

then, another round-o-talk.. this time, about elyang.. she's entangled in a situation where a normal woman would want to give up once faced with the scenario.. but she remained strong.. so strong that i wasn't able to utter any word of advice for her.. personally, i would choose to play and track the other way.. her way of thinking was of such a magnitude that i can't even picture myself doing the same thing she did.. for this, i salute you..

at the end of the day, i was so happy.. not because of the problems that my friends are facing but because a lot of people cling on my wisdom.. twas this time i felt that i am appreciated.. that somehow, what i say counts.. and being relied upon.. my life is not that wasted afte all..

ka-ta-nga-han

4th of may. today is different.. honestly, i'm not o'ryt.. there's this fear in me and the denial that goes with it in loosing a person i have come to love.. as i have said, im overly stupid and surprisingly flexible.. i even consider myself a masochist of some sort.. pain is my happiness..

honestly, this post doesn't talk of me alone.. it involves some persons and the personifications we have made out of our very own doings.. thus, the title.. Ka-ta-nga-han is a noun which means lacking in intelligence or exhibiting the quality of having been done by someone lacking in intelligence.. you know who you are and the intricacies of your problems.. I CAN'T HELP YOU THIS TIME.. how i wish i can elaborate on this matter.. i know you will figure it all out..

to someone out there i am the beloved, hurt me.. castigate me.. fuck me! my senses have become numb.. my consciousness refuses to believe the existence of pain and suffering.. it's as if evrything is on their charged counterparts.. you deconstructed my thoughts.. my emotions.. my definitions.. i have mutated.. now, im a fucked up dumbshit.. but im starting to like the feeling! lol..

AND TO SOMEONE OUT THERE WHO THINKS SHE'S SO DAMN PRETTY AND SMART, how dare you insinuate that i shall tolerate a diabolic act of insolence from a mere SCRAP of humanity like you! and if you'll insist on such accusations i will be obliged to summon all my powers to pulverize you!! hahaha.. YOU'LL NEVER KNOW WHEN KARMA WILL HIT YOU..

mawnin fellahz!

journal 4-2-3-09

again, sorry.. i haven't had any time to post an article yesterday.. i was out the whole day visiting friends and scouting for puppies.. besides, there is nothing so cool to write about.. been home based the day before that..

the 3rd of may was great.. we went to la carlotta to visit a classmate-friend.. she invited me to come for their pasasalamat festival.. since it was my first time, my partner and i had to make use of the services of the company driver to drive for us.. we went to la carlotta early in the morning thinking that there will be lots of scheduled activities and celebrations which, like any other festivities, would normally start in the morning.. but there was none. it was a rainy pasasalamat.. the city doesn't even look like they're having a festival.. needless to say, yes we were frustrated.. instead, we went to ed's kennel to check their rots..

after lunch, we went to silay to check on another puppy.. this time, an american bulldog.. they were soooo cute.. we have decided to buy one girl puppy and today is the scheduled pickup.. that one excites me..

by the way, right before we went to church, i went to an optical clinic to check on my eyes.. the machine gave an analysis that i have a problem so i need to undergo a manual check up.. thank god i still have a 20/20 vision.. i can now wear my contacts! hahaha

mawnin fellahs!

feast of st. "ME"..

i woke up early.. its labor day.. as early as 9:45am there were already rallyists marching on the streets of bcd.. the march was so long that i had to get out of the taxi and walk my way up to the mall.. since the mall opens at 10am, i stayed in pietro kaffee for a cup of coffee.. there were so many jobless people as early as i am.. sad reality.. but i dont want to dwell with it.. those topics are for the students of marx, lenin and mao.. i don't want to compete with them.. i'm not armed with the technical words of a socialist..

the job fair was so crowded.. i checked on the companies but i can't find a better one for me.. i want to have a job but i don't want to compromise my study.. almost all of the companies who joined the job fair are mall affiliates. there's no way i can still continue law school if that's the case..

my bestfriend joined me for lunch in chicken deli.. a brief fun at the arcade.. then some fries and floats in mcdo for snacks.. this time, some of his friends are with us..

then one funny thing happened. a call.. it was mr. chatmate.. he told me he wanted to hear my voice.. he was horny.. i told him i can't talk to him with such a topic 'coz im outside eating with my friends.. that i am sitting in one small table with them and there's no way i can tell him anything! and guys, you know what he did?? my bestfriend could attest to this.. he jacked off while i was talking with him! waaaaaaaah!

at 4:30pm i went to piazza.. im meeting elyang there.. she wasnt around yet so i first posted my "end of april" blog.. we talked about our friends.. our friendship.. about me.. and about her.. i found out she was not o'ryt..

by the way, there's something i need to apologize for..

first for what i have promised yesterday about me writing something about elyang.. i cant and i wont anymore.. please understand me as much as i understand elyang.. she's not o'ryt and i dont want to do anything that may aggravate the whole situation..

second, i want to apologize to you elyang.. i know i am to be blamed partly.. i dont want to discuss the details.. we all know that.. maybe, just maybe.. you won't be as bothered as you are now if not for my playful mind.. im dead serious about this.. my apologies..

i promised i will not be dealing with topics that might complicate things.. let it be that way.. i respect my friends as they have been respectful of me.. if u want to read entertainment, don't look for it here.. check your magazines instead.. mwah mwah mwah!

the rest is ancient history.. BOoORING! lol

end of april..

extraordinary day.. not that something unusual happened.. matter of fact, there was none.. making it a little extraordinary..

as usual, i went to the local mall where i spent my boring hours wasting money for some cheap brewed coffees.. texted my friends.. zero availability. went to the salon and had my nails cleaned and back to the same coffee shop to drown myself with caffeine and nicotine..

time check: 3:30pm. i still have two hours to waste before my class in criminal law starts.. then, a ring.. its jaypee.. rakistah's ex.. the call wasn't meant for me.. he needs to talk to his ex through me.. im mr. congeniality, you know.. i cant afford to totally hate a person no matter how grave his offenses..

before the class started, another ring.. another man.. this time, elyang's "i-dont-know-how-to-call-it" love affair.. lol. been wanting to write something about them but their relationship was some kind of a mixture of everything that i don't even know where to start.. someday, i will.. i promise.. dont worry, i already have elyang's consent.. hehehe..

have a great night fellahs!